“Oh, that feels so good,” cooed Harper Korch as she lay on the bed of the Lord Biltmore Hotel’s penthouse suite. The gorgeous young actress, 4’11” and 83 lbs. of pubescent pulchritude, loved the feel of the satin sheets against her skin. She slowly stroked her luxurious chestnut hair and turned her head to look up at me. Her complexion was sun-kissed and she had a full, ruby-red lips and the most truly violet-coloured eyes I had ever seen in an Earthling.
“I have an appointment this afternoon,” said I, standing beside the bed wearing the royal blue velvet dressing-robe the hotel had provided. “But the studio will be sending a driver to take you to the airport before then.”
“Oh, are you off to see another young girl already?” Harper enquired playfully.
“Actually, another old scientist,” I replied.
I had first met Miss Harper Korch, herself an earlier form of my wonderful Millie Drake, when an associate of mine in Hollywood had suggested that rumours of her allegedly dating me would be a good publicity ploy for her budding career. The lass, after having become a model for a lingerie company called “1st Bra Rah-Rah-Rah”, had appeared in a couple of independent films -- one a “slasher” flick entitled Dead Tweenagers, the other a “found footage” horror film called Paranormal Pyjama Party -- and had now been contracted by a major studio for a new series of action-adventure epics in which she would play a young lady with strange powers that had come about as the result of some secret government experiment. Oy vey, the things these people come up with!
That she would be romantically linked to me had just seemed a fine promotional stunt for such a production, indeed in the “Old Hollywood” tradition. Nevertheless, sometimes life imitates art.
“This as such a nice hotel,” said the nymphet, turning over on her back and stretching. “I’d like to come back again when I finish shooting the movie.”
“Why?” I quipped. “Did you lose something here?”
She blushed and giggled. “You know I did!”
“What? An earring or brooch or something, or…?”
There was a knock at the door and the muffled cry of “Room Service.”
“Ah,” said I. “Our breakfast is served.”
I opened the door and wheeled in the covered cart. The bellhop (or whatever they call them now) was nowhere to be seen.
By now Harper Korch had slipped into a little pink dressing-gown, which only served to highlight the slender perfection of her figure, and we sat down to our morning meal. It was simple but elegant: scrambled eggs, turkey bacon, and a large mound of hot toast with strawberry jam. For beverages we had freshly-squeezed orange juice and hot, highly-caffeinated French coffee.
We were quite enjoying this repast when I noticed something odd out of the corner of my eye. It was as if a small silvery thing had jumped off from underneath the food-cart and had darted at lightning speed to behind the near-by sofa.
‘What was that?!” yelped the girl. “A mouse?”
“I looked just a bit too big for a mouse,” I rejoined. “Also a bit too… metallic.”
Cautioning the lass to stay where she was, I walked over to the sofa. Before I could quite see behind it the thing suddenly jumped out and up into the air directly towards me. I had a brief glimpse of the creature -- it looked vaguely like a tin “animal” about the size of a small rat -- before it was at my throat!
The thing was incredibly strong, and it was only my superior Algolitish strength that enabled me to pull it away before it did whatever damage it had intended. I tried to toss it across the room but it stayed hovering before me, just long enough for me to quickly surround it with a sphere of my own bright orange and blue energies.
(This was at a time when I was empowered with certain experimental abilities from the Watchers of Algol.)
I heard a sharp popping sound from within the energy-sphere, and, when my power dissipated, the small metal monster was gone. It was as if it had self-destructed, exploding into microscopic bits.
“Is… is… is it dead?” queried Harper, who had put her hands over her eyes in fright.
“Yes, it is quite gone now, love,“ I assured her, taking her in my arms in a comforting embrace. “It must have slipped in with the cart. Nothing to worry about now. Here, have some more coffee.”
Whilst the lass was getting over her fright, I telephoned the front-desk and enquired as to which bellhop had brought up our breakfast. They replied that they did not know. The food-carts, they informed me, are left outside of the kitchen for the first available server to take, so it could have been any of several people who were currently on duty at the large downtown city hotel.
I hung up the telephone, thinking it best to make no further enquiries. Whatever the thing had been, it was obviously alien technology, and was meant for me alone. No doubt the source would be revealed soon enough.
“Daniel… I guess strange things like this do happen to you, don’t they?” asked the girl, having overcome her fright somewhat with the recuperative powers of the very young, along with my reassuring presence. “And even stranger things.”
“Stranger things, indeed,” I said, trying to make light of it for her benefit. “I say, Harper, my dear, we still have a couple of hours before the limousine arrives to take you to meet your flight…”
At this the delectable damsel smiled gorgeously and jumped up so that she landed back on the bed, somewhat upsetting the closure of her dressing-gown.
“So…” she purred. “What are we going to do until then?” …
My name is RUMANOS -- DOCTOR DANIEL RUMANOS, Intergalactic Man of Mystery. Even though I have the physical appearance of an human being, I am in fact many thousands of years old and do carry within my blood the vastly-superior genes of the legendary Watchers of the Daemon-Star ALGOL. This extraterrestrial heritage grants me numerous capabilities that appear as “magic” to less-advanced beings.
Whilst most Algolites keep to themselves, practicing a sort of elitist seclusion from the rest of the Universe, I am an operative for a secret organisation called the KOSMIKOS, tasked with using our abilities to maintain peace and order throughout existence. Assigned to Planet Earth, I protect its people from alien invasions, mad scientists, and indeed all manner of threats. I am the living icon of Algol upon this world. I am THE DAEMON-STAR!!! …
After seeing young Miss Harper Korch safely off on her way to big-time Hollywood film stardom, I hurried on to my appointment, arriving at the research facility (located as it was in a rather isolated part of the County), at the stroke of 1:00 PM, now wearing my usual velvet suit, opera capy, jungle boots, sunspecs, and panama hat.
The facility, built upon the framework of an old warehouse, was designed by my acquaintance Dr. Lawrence Conn for use as a tracking station for possible signals denoting the presence of intelligent life in Outer Space. Known as The Lolita Complex, it was named after Dr. Conn’s wife, who had died in childbirth fourteen years before the time of this account.
I entered the Complex after going through the usual security clearance, and found Dr. Conn alone in the main control centre. The room was crammed full of computers, electronic devices, and sound amplification equipment of all kinds.
“Thanks for coming by, Rumanos,” said Conn with a warm handshake. He was in his mid-fifties, his salt-and-pepper hair having that somewhat unkempt look of a distracted genius. He was dressed in slacks and a suit-coat with no tie.
“No problem, Conn, old chap,” I replied. “I was quite intrigued to hear you had received an unexplained signal. You say it seems to be approaching Earth?”
“Yes, indeed!” exclaimed the scientist, actually clapping his hands together with excitement. “There is nothing on visual or radar, but the signal is strong and clear. Also oddly, no one else seems to have found it!”
“Really? None of the military tracking stations? Their work is classified, of course.”
“Oh, I know, but we scientists seldom pay much attention to that sort of thing, do we? I mean, among ourselves. It has been three days, so at least one of my colleagues in the field would have mentioned something to me by now.”
“Of course. May I see a readout of what you have?”
“Yes, here it is,” he said, motioning me to a video screen on which was a record of the recurring signals. “Just look at those FRBs!”
“Fascinating,” said I. “Repeating fast radio bursts, and they are indeed approaching Earth.”
As I was looking at the screen, I heard to door open behind us.
“Has Mr. Jones gotten to work yet, Papa?” said a sweet female voice. “I need him to help me move some equipment in the auxiliary control room. Oh! I didn’t know we had company…”
I stood up and turned around. The speaker was a beautiful young girl, slender and rather tall for her years, with auburn hair, skin of purest white, and enchanting mist-grey eyes. She was wearing a simple powder-blue dress.
“Dr. Daniel Rumanos,” said Dr. Conn by way of introduction, “this is my daughter, Lolita.”
“Call me ‘Lolly’,” said the girl with a lovely smile.
“Charmed to meet you, Lolly,” said I with a courtly bow. “Please just call me Daniel.”
“No, Mr. Jones isn’t here yet,” continued Dr. Conn with a sigh of exasperation. “I don’t know what’s wrong with that ridiculous boy.”
“Employee trouble, Conn?” I enquired.
“Yes indeed,” replied the scientist. “A young man named Dick Jones, supposed to be my research assistant. Annoying little thing. I think he’s a bit of a… well, a…”
“He’s a real flamer, you mean!” laughed the girl.
“Watch your language, child,” admonished the old man.
“Ah, you mean he is one who prefers Ganymede to Hebe, as they say in the Classical Literature Department,” I offered.
Lolly Conn laughed all the more at my humour. Apparently, she had at least taken enough of a break from her father’s extraterrestrial delving hard-science to read Thomas Bulfinch, or perhaps Edith Hamilton.
“Mr. Jones only works here,” said Dr. Conn, “because his uncle made a sizable financial contribution to our facility.”
“I say, would that be James E. Jones, the wealthy industrialist?” I queried.
“The same.”
“Interesting. Such people usually are not all that much interested in science.”
“It’s not like our Mr. Jones to be late to work though,” said Lolly. “He’s usually here first thing in the morning, and even stays after we leave at night.”
“Indeed,” added Conn. “The annoying boy takes up so much time talking about social issues and all that. No sign of him today, though.”
Suddenly, we were interrupted by an alarm sounding at one of the computer consoles.
“Oh my goodness!” exclaimed Dr. Conn, running over to the area. “We have something on radar… and visual!”
I rushed over to the console, as did the girl. She seemed to inch closer to me, as if with a premonition of fear.
“It’s… it has already entered the atmosphere and is approaching the facility!” continued Dr. Conn.
“Then will the government be not tracking it by now as well?” I asked.
“Probably not. This equipment has some upgrades of my own, and is tuned to frequencies not usually monitored.”
“So,” said Lolly excitedly, “can we see it, Papa?”
“Yes,” said the scientist, adjusting the controls. “Here we go!”
On the video screen then appeared the shape of a rocket-ship descending through the clouds.
“Holy Heaven’s Hell!” I swore, an eldritch chill creeping up my spine. “That looks like a…”
I was then interrupted by a voice talking through the main speaker of the console. It was emotionless and sounded like a human-type voice modulated through an electronic enhancement device.
“We will be landing at your facility within moments. You will show no resistance or we will destroy you. Your facility is now ours, from which will launch our campaign for the subjugation of this planet. You will be converted. You will be like us.”
It was then that the countenance of the speaker appeared on the screen. It was an horrid cybernetic man of a type I knew all to well, and I then realised that The Lolita Complex, and forsooth the entire human race, was indeed in serious peril.
Lolly Conn gasped in horror at the sight and unconsciously took my hand.
“What… What is that thing?” she breathed.
“Yes, Rumanos’” said her father, his scientific curiosity overcoming his own momentary shock. “Do you recognise it at all?”
“Yes,” said I, forcing myself to speak the hideous realisation. “This planet is being invaded… by a force of Leknii Replicants!!”
“Alien invaders! But what are they?”
“Cybernetic beings from the planet Leknii, a world on the outer rim of Spiral Galaxy 8675309. Originally humanoid, they began to replace their organic components with mechanical parts to combat the unhealthy effects of climate change caused by industrial pollution on their planet. They are more machine now than man, and roam the space-ways in their small-but-efficient ships looking for other human-type beings that they can then convert into their kind. The Replicants are without emotion, fully dedicated to the furthering of their own sort through conversion and assimilation -- by force!”
“But… can they be stopped?” queried Lolly.
“I have succeeded in doing so before, but they have weapons that are potentially lethal even to my more-than-normal abilities, and…”
Just then, we were interrupted by the door of the control room opening. Through it walked a young man, thin and of medium height, with sandy hair and a pallid complexion. He was wearing a dark-hued business suit.
“Mr. Jones!” exclaimed Conn. “I suppose you see we have a situation here. But how did you get past the security door? Even though you have clearance, we have to buzz you in for safety reasons.”
“That is no longer the case, Dr. Conn,” said Dick Jones. “You are no longer in control of the Complex.”
“What! Explain yourself, Mr. Jones!” thundered the old scientist, standing up in indignation.
“I have been in contact with the Leknii for some time. I have altered the security codes so that there will be no resistance to them taking over The Lolita Complex.”
“You traitor!” retorted Lolly. “All those nights you ‘worked late’, you were talking to… them!”
“So, exactly why would you do such a thing, young man?” I enquired. “The Replicants of Leknii are cyborgs, literally heartless invaders. They would overrun your entire planet, convert your entire species to their own cold, unfeeling kind.”
“Don’t preach to me, Dr. Rumanos!” he rejoined with a look of madness clouding his features. “Yes, I know who you are, you patriarchal garbage!”
“It was you!” said I in realisation. “It was you tried to assassinate me in my hotel suite this morning!”
“Of course. ‘Room Service!’,” he mocked.
“Oh my goodness!” suddenly exclaimed the girl. “Look!”
Outside the large, plate-glass window of the control room, we could see the Leknii rocket-ship descending, the fumes of its fiery exhaust filling the exterior air as it landed in the adjoining field.
“They are here!” exulted Dick Jones. “The Leknii have come to our world, and will upgrade the human race as they have promised me! No more gender! No more homophobia! No more scummy patriarchs and perverted girl-lovers like you, Daniel frigging Rumanos!!”
Outside, a troop of Replicants was marching down the ramp from the spaceship, tall and silver and armed with weapons beyond anything the human race could defend itself against…
“Quick, Lolita!” ordered Dr. Conn. “Help me reprogram the clearance codes! At least we can keep those things out of the facility!”
“It’s no use, Dr. Conn!” mocked Jones. “The Leknii have given me security guards!”
With this, there rolled through the doorway several small, oval-shaped silver things that surrounded us all within a split second.
“Those are Leknii service robots, are they not?” I said. “By the Daemonian Spires! I should have recognised the one you used in your murder attempt earlier! It destroyed itself too quickly for me to identify it.”
“Oh, very good, Dr. Rumanos, very good,” returned the mad Mr. Jones. “They are armed with a poison. One move from any of you and they will use it! This is the day! The day of the Leknii! The day of Pride!!”
I could not risk using my Algolitish powers against the small mechanical horrors. There were too many of them, and they could have easily attacked the girl or the old man before I could have disabled them all.
“You fool! You traitorous fool!” shouted Dr. Conn, lunging to-wards Jones as if to pummel him. “I won’t let you use the work I’ve given my days for to destroy this world… !”
Lolly Conn screamed and Dick Jones laughed at what occurred. For it was then that one of the Leknii service robots leaped from the floor and attached itself to the throat of Dr. Lawrence Conn, injecting its hideous poison into the old man’s bloodstream!!
Do you recognise the horror, the unspeakable terror of this situation, my friends? The Lolita Complex was under siege from alien invaders, a force of cybernetic life-forms intent on converting the entire human race into their own soulless, loveless, unfeeling kind -- and the director of that research facility, a kindly old scientist named Dr. Lawrence Conn, was now having his bloodstream poisoned by an hideous rodent-like robot guard of those invaders!
“Papa!” screamed the girl. “Oh no, Papa!”
I held Lolly back from running over to her father.
“No,“ I told the lass, pulling her close to me. “Try to stay calm or these bloody Repli-Rats will just attack you as well.”
Dr. Conn collapsed on the floor and the service robot scuttled away from him.
“He will not die,” said Dick Jones. “It only injected a small portion of the venom into him. Just enough to temporarily disable him. It won’t do any permanent harm, and Dr. Conn will be converted once our new masters, the Leknii, have used his knowledge of the proper codes to fully take over this facility.”
“You and your metal masters will fail, Jones,” said I. “Just as you failed in your attempt to murder me earlier. You knew Dr. Conn had called me in to investigate those alien signals he had detected, and the Leknii know that I can defeat them!”
“You won’t succeed this time, Daniel Rumanos, you deplorable nympholept!” rejoined Jones. “Our new masters are here, and the planet Earth will soon be converted into a new gender-free zone!”
Just then, two Leknii Replicants marched into the room, both nearly seven feet in height and gleaming silver steel. I felt Lolly Conn’s form shudder at the sight of them as she huddled close to me.
“Do not worry, love,” I whispered softly to her, letting my lips brush with soft kisses to her ear, her cheek, and them her mouth. “Do not worry. There is a way to…”
“Move apart,” interrupted one of the Replicants, raising its arm, which I knew contained a weapon potentially detrimental to even my Algolitish physique. “Move apart or we will destroy you both.”
Frightened by the threat, which was all the more terrible due to the thing’s emotionless, perfectly-modulated voice, the girl moved out of my embrace but continued to grasp my arm.
“This one is not truly human and therefore unsuitable for conversion,” announced the Leknii in reference to me.
“Yes, he’s the one I told you about,” lisped Jones. “A threat that should be destroyed.”
“That is affirmed. He will now be eliminated. The other is human and shall be the first to be converted.”
“No!” I exclaimed. “You can’t take this girl, this mere child, and… !”
However, before I could continue, the Replicant shot a blast of energy from the weapon concealed within its metallic arm. The bolt hit me with full force, sending me against the far wall to crumple to the floor in extreme, agonising pain.
“Take the other for immediate conversion,” I heard the Leknii order. “The service robots will remain here as guards.”
It was then that a short babble of sound filled my head as the darkness of unconsciousness approached. I heard Lolly Conn scream and Dick Jones laugh and the march of metallic heels as the cybernetic Replicants dragged the helpless damsel away and left me and the unconscious Dr. Conn -- who was now in no condition to be of any notice to them -- alone in the besieged scientific research centre known as The Lolita Complex.
Then the blackness of oblivion overcame me.
Myriad were the thoughts that pierced through the darkness in my mind. I thought of my home on the planet Daemonia, ninety-three light-years distant. I thought of family and friends and enemies. I thought of those lost. I thought of the human race, so vulnerable and unknowing of the vast and sundry horrors that surround it in the Cosmos. So frail and weak, and yet with such potential. So much like that little girl, she with the silky auburn hair and the fairest of complexions and those lovely mist-grey-eyes…
I thought of the beautiful Miss Lolita “Lolly” Conn and rallied. Fighting to shake off the effects of the energy-blast the Replicant had given me, a blast indeed strong enough to have killed an human being, I rallied my Algolitish powers of self-healing and stood up.
I opened my eyes to see the Repli-Rats still guarding the room. Before they could react, I cast a wave of my bright orange and blue energies at them, short-circuiting their systems. The small, rodent-like robots shattered into tiny shards.
Moving quickly, I checked on Dr. Conn. The old man was breathing steadily, and I knew he would recover. I turned and ran out of the building.
Outside, the Leknii had already taken the helpless girl aboard their rocket-ship. On the entrance-ramp, facing me as I approached, were one Replicant and the horrid villain known to eternal infamy as Dick Jones.
“We expected you, Rumanos,” he sneered. “But you are too late! Our new masters are taking that silly girl-child for conversion.”
“Jones, you are a traitor to your very species!” I accused. “You deserve no mercy, but I shall give you one chance! Stand aside, I say, stand aside NOW!”
“No, I won’t,“ Jones laughed. “Your patriarchal society is over. Soon I too will be fully converted into a genderless Replicant, and then… !”
“That is incorrect,” interrupted the Leknii standing beside him.
“Huh?” stammered Jones in confusion. “What do you mean?”
“You have been found inferior and diseased with emotions even for a fully organic being,” continued the Replicant, turning to face Jones. “You are unsuitable for conversion.”
And with this, the Replicant blasted Dick Jones into oblivion with a burst of its energies. He barely had time to shriek in terror and pain before he crumpled into a mass of charred matter upon the ramp.
“A flaming one indeed,” said I.
Seeing my chance, I shot a bolt of my own Algolitish powers at the Leknii, carefully targeting the respirator-grating at the centre of its chest area. This, which supplies oxygen to the small but vital organic component of the Replicant, I knew to be their weak-point. The metallic giant shuddered and then exploded into shards.
I hurried up the entrance ramp into the Leknii rocket, running down its strangely-lit metallic hallway until I came to the conversion room. As I approached, I felt the ship start to quake. An effect I had expected was commencing.
Entering the conversion room, I saw Lolly strapped to the wall of computerised machinery utilised for the process. There were two Replicants beside her, but they seemed immobilised. As I approached, they shattered into tiny pieces.
“If I can just switch the polarisation of the neutronic stream, this effect shall spread to the entire ship,” said I, making some quick adjustments to the already-compromised computer system. “Ah, here we go!”
I then freed Lolly Conn from her straps and, picking up the swooning damsel in my arms, ran at full speed from the rocket-ship.
I took the girl to safety behind some brush in the field just as the Leknii spaceship exploded, shattering into the countless microscopic fragments to which their technology reverts when destroyed, a safety measure to prevent the easy cannibalisation of their advanced machinery.
“Daniel... ” said Lolly groggily. “Daniel… what happened?”
“It is all right now, Lolly,” I assured her as we lay in the grassy field. “The Replicants are destroyed, along with Mr. Jones, and Earth is now safe.”
“Thank goodness!” exclaimed the lass. “But why couldn’t they… ‘convert’ me?”
“Well, you see, your biology had recently been stimulated beyond the endurance of their systems. I knew that the hormonal response of the adolescent human female is far too intense for their cold electronic tech, so I encouraged its arousal. That is why I kissed you before.”
“Oh, is that the only reason?” she teased.
“Well, perhaps not the ONLY reason, love,“ said I, pulling her close and kissing her more fully than before, a kiss that the girl indeed returned with some enthusiasm.
“Papa!” she suddenly exclaimed.
“What?” I said. “Oh, right!”
We both leaped up and ran together into the Complex. Happily, we found the redoubtable Dr. Conn alive and well, having awakened from the effects of the blast and now sitting at the control panel examining his beloved radio telescope receiver systems.
“Papa!” exclaimed the delighted Lolly, hurrying over to him. “Oh, I’m so glad you’re okay!”
“Yes, I’m fine, child,” said the scientist. “A bit of a headache, but nothing a cup of tea won’t cure. But what happened to those alien invaders?”
“No worries, Conn,“ I answered. “The Leknii have been destroyed, the human race is safe, and The Lolita Complex is once again free to probe Deep Space. All thanks in part to your daughter, I should add.”
“How do you mean?” queried Conn.
“Oh, just something Daniel taught me,” said Lolly, giggling as she went to prepare the tea.
“Incredible!” said her father, shaking my hand. “I guess we owe you a debt of gratitude, Rumanos. I mean, I knew my little Lolita was a fast learner…”
“Yes, I found her to be quite fast indeed.”
“Still, you must be quite the pedagogue.”
“Indeed,” I mused, “I have often been called something like that.”
***** DANIEL RUMANOS AND MILLIE DRAKE SHALL RETURN
